Vocation

So, today I was in an interview for a mindless job in a call center, that I will probably take for the money, it's full time and offers benefits...and I haven't heard back from the church job I applied to a few weeks ago. But anyways, in my interview today I said something along the lines of "Religion, that's what I do." Which was true... being a religion major, leading Scope, and working for InterAct were all incredibly satisfying, fulfilling, meaningful things. Unfortunately, I graduated and the youth fellows program ended and other than my person relationship with Absolute Reality, prayer, and some books I've had very little to do with religion since May. Today, after my interview I started to question everything... did I want to take this job? Do I want to move? To change my whole life? What do I want to do with my life? What is my purpose? And who the hell am I? I can tell you I have answers for a few of those questions, but no idea on some others. Then, on this train of thought I happened upon the notion of vocation: a concept we discussed often in the Merton seminar. Having a vocation, a calling, makes a lot of sense to me. Some people are just better fit for some jobs, on a base level. To toss some process thought in the mix, God offers us the lure, right, and we have the ability to respond fully to that or not so much... me working at a call center is me not fully responding to the lure. It's me ignoring what I'm rather sure is my vocation- religion. So, tomorrow I'm going to call the church I applied to and beg them to consider me... because part of me has to. No I won't make the same amount of money and it probably doesn't offer benefits but sometimes to do what you're meant to do is more important than a paycheck. I've always known that.

For Shame, but I finally have something to say

I was having a conversation recently about Christianity, and what makes one a Christian..

The person I was talking to was shocked when I said I don't think that you have to believe Jesus is Christ in order to be a Christian... and they avidly disagreed with me.

I wasn't surprised by their reaction, most people think about Christianity, or religion in general, as a set to beliefs one has to ascribe to. I get it- that's the traditional view. You have to believe that Jesus is Christ, that Jesus rose from the dead, that Jesus was the son of God, that Jesus is the Messiah, Jesus was born of a virgin in a manger in Bethlehem etc. But... as a Process theologian, I don't think that there is any categorical difference between Jesus and the rest of us, Jesus wasn't given any special connection to God- what made Jesus unique was his responsiveness to the lure. As I have said before, it's not that Jesus isn't God, but God is in all of us, we can all be Jesus. We all have the potential, we all have the free will to make the choices that would make us fully responsive to the divine lure to good. Furthermore, Jesus himself said that the two most important commandments are to love God and love others, not to believe that he is Christ.

I really don't think what you 'believe' is important, I think it is what you do with the time you are given in this body, on this earth, for this lifetime that is important. It's not what you believe, it's how you live. I think the message of Jesus that is important, important to me at least, is the message of love... the message of non-violence.. the messages in the Sermon on the Mount (aside from the stuff about adultery/marrying a divorcee- I think this is rubbish)

I sincerely hope that religious life, religious meaning, faith etc does not have to be boiled down, reduced down to accepting a list of things to ascribe to... to me that is blind, and ultimately pointless. Am I truly a Christian person if I say I believe Jesus is Christ but live a life of depravity? I just think it is irresponsible to think that belief is more important than what one actually does... it's why I like Process, we are accountable for what we do- our choices, our actions have direct and important ramifications immediately, and what God can offer us in the next moment and the next...

I'm not saying belief is bad. I'm just saying I don't think it is the apex of what I want my religious life to be. I don't believe that Jesus is Christ, and yet I can still think of myself as a follower of Jesus. I don't call myself a Christian, purposefully- and I've explored some of the reasons why in this blog before, but in conversation with my Process friends and with John, I have realized that it is what is written on my heart that matters, it is what I do for others, it is how I live my life that matters- not what label I choose to slap on the chaos that is my spiritual life.

Belief can be beautiful, but it can also be hallow. It can be empty, fruitless. What I am interested in, what I think of as true Christianity, what Jesus was really going after, was a life lived with heart, a life lived with intentionality, a life filled with compassion

This semester I learned about the concept of anonymous Christians... I was initially told it was Pope John Paul II's idea, which made me happy because I loved him, but I found out that it actually came from Jesuit theologian, Karl Rahner. According to Rahner, a person could explicitly deny Christianity, but in reality "existentially is committed to those values which for the Christian are concretized in God." In other words, someone who loves God and loves others but does not identify as Christian. This also points out that Christianity is not just an amalgamation of beliefs, nor just one belief of Jesus as Christ, but it is a way of living.

I rest my case.

Now I have to work on my paper.

Pax,
Rachael

Peace

My mom's best friend, Joyce, passed away yesterday. She's been battling cancer for years, and in my heart I know she has now found peace.

My mom is very sad. Which makes my heart sad because she is my mommy.

It has been my experience that people often ask "Why did God make this happen?" or "Why did God let this happen?" I would have asked the same question a few years ago. However, buying into process theology... my God doesn't make things happen. Cells have free will. Sometimes those cells mutate, cancer then happens. I don't think that there is some 'dude' sitting up in 'heaven' making a list of people that should be stricken with cancer or death etc. In fact, the God I believe in cannot do those things. And I find it comforting that God is with us through the things we experience, the pains and sorrows.

So, as I try to comfort my mom in the next few days, weeks, months and so on all I can do is show her, and others, alternatives... my little fractured thoughts about how things work.

So, may Joyce rest in peace. May she been more fully in the presence of God, and may she continue to touch the hearts and lives of those of us still walking this earth. I, for one, think she will be reborn into another beautiful person. And the people that know her new form will know her smile, the joy of her laugh, and the beauty of her soul.